"I know you suffer, I see it day by day. Are you sure you do not suffer needlessly? There are other ways, Frodo, other paths we might take."

"I know you suffer, I see it day by day. Are you sure you do not suffer needlessly? There are other ways, Frodo, other paths we might take."

I'm still astounded by how well Tolkien seems to know my life.  Maybe it's that he knew a lot about life and shared everything he learned throughout his life through perfectly worded quotes like those I have used in my blog thus far. Yet Tolkien wrote this based on a life of experience yet I seem to go through something relatable, no matter how minute.

Because I will not solely be focusing on my Christmas break and what I've done since December 2nd, it was great and relaxing. I really enjoyed having all of the time off of school and got a chance to meet some off my extended host family.  New Year's Eve was definitely one to remember and as will all time I've had off of school, I spent a fare amount of time with my exchange students friends just sitting in each other's company talking and drinking tea, always a good time.

Since being in Spain I've been keeping a journal of all my random thoughts and feelings. Some of my entries can be very philosophical trying to figure out the problems of the world and what it means to be part of a different culture. Others are just me complaining about my host mom or how I have no friends. Through this I've discovered that no matter how catastrophic my problems feel at that moment, writing them down usually helps me realize they are nothing. Plus, if I can't even write more than 3 sentence about something that's been on my mind all day, chances are it's really not that big of a deal.

I've you've ever talked to me for more than an hour and really gotten to experience my rambling and deeper inner thoughts, you'd know that I over think everything.  Like mentioned in a previous blog post, my head is constantly spinning with millions of thoughts and questions. And given 6 hours a day to sit and dwell on them is doing interesting things to my psyche.

Many people who have gone on exchange before me have said this year will be the best of my life.  I don't necessarily think that is true. Instead I prefer to think of what another wise Rotex (ex- exchange student) said, this probably won't be the best year of your life, but it will be the year where you change the most and learn the most about yourself. I've changed in countless ways, some which I likely haven't even noticed yet and won't until someone points them out for me. One of the main things I have been seeing change in myself is my strength. This blog post was prompted by a link my dad emailed me. He sent me it a month ago and I never bothered to read it until today.  It talks about the difference between being fragile and antifragile. As I read through it I realized how much of me has changed since coming to Spain.

First off a little synopsis. The article talked about a book called Antifragile: Things That Gain from Disorder. Antifragile simply means the opposite of fragile, that instead of breaking under pressure and stress, adversity makes an antifragile thing stronger. Each time something falls apart, the antifragile thing comes away stronger and more prepared than before. Clearly the article explains it way more in depth than me and if you do have time I would highly recommend reading it. Even if you just read the intro it would be a huge help to understanding what I will try to explain. Here it is: http://www.artofmanliness.com/2013/12/03/beyond-sissy-resilience-on-becoming-antifragile/

Because I have been living in a foreign country, completely out of my comfort zone and with a family very different from mine back home, I would say I have been under a lot of stress and adversity.

At the beginning of my year I was so concerned with doing my year right.  Like a fragile person constantly trying to look for the optimism and not leaving room for fault, I tried to be completely perfect right off the bat. As far as making friends go, I waited around for people to come to me rather than blundering my way through my first weeks and in doing that making friends with those who helped me. Instead I tried to be perfectly on time to everything, know people's expectations of me and do everything perfectly before it was even asked.  I realize now all I did was hurt myself. Same goes for my host family.  As I came into my house I was given a few rules about do's and don'ts, but certainly not all of them.  I tired to go about living without stepping on anyone's toes and it proved impossible! I didn't know what spoons and cups to use, not to rinse my dishes, not to sit in front of the open window or set things on my bed. I didn't know not to walk around the house without shoes on or not to leave stop on top of my desk.  So many little things which I had no way of knowing, yet I got down on myself each time.  By trying to be perfect I only made myself more vulnerable.  Each time my host mom added a new rule I would fall all the way down to where I began. Everything I had done up till that point to make myself comfortable in my house came crashing down once I could no longer sit on my bed unless for sleeping or I needed to keep all my bags downstairs on a hook.  The first couple of times this happened it took me over a week to work myself back up to being comfortable again. I always felt so broken and out of place, but always got back up using strength I didn't know I had.

Each time my world of walking on egg shells came crashing down, I became stronger and it started taking me less time to recover.  Now, 4 months passed, it only takes me 10 minutes of getting used to. My host mom adds a new rule and as always it catches me off guard and I freak for a second, but then I always realize that adding this small thing to my daily routine is nothing compared to what all I have done in the past. 10 minutes or less then I move on with my life. I'm so much stronger than I was before and each new obstacle becomes less and less scary.

I'm slowly developing my antifragile shell. When my world I shattered all there is left to do now is grow from it. Bounce back and be even stronger than I was before. Don't get me wrong, I still worry about a million different things, but now I know that failing is something to be excited about, that the randomness of life is what makes you stronger.

I'm only 18 and have a world of experiences before me. If I'm already padded with the strength I've received from other mishaps, each failure will seem that much stronger.

So I may not be traveling and adventuring all around Europe like I planned, having the best year of my life, but I believe I got something better. Through this crazy whirlwind of emotions and feelings, I'm discovering my strengths and weaknesses, as well as parts of my character I didn't know existed before. Truly a gift in itself. To be stripped of everything so you are able to see who you are and what is important to you.

So as Tolkien put it, I may be suffering, but suffering needlessly. There are other ways to go about it and I will likely end up stronger than I ever was before.


Just a small part of my mental journey I wanted to share with you. And to thank Rotary Youth Exchange for giving me the opportunity to discover these things about myself as well as grow as a person.

Some day all of these random thoughts and journal entries I have will make me a better person, if not smarter about the world. And that's the point of all of this isn't it?



 

"And though in all lands, love is now mingled with grief, it still grows, perhaps, the greater"

"And though in all lands, love is mingled with grief, it still grows, perhaps, the greater"

This past weekend was Thanksgiving weekend and goodness, I have so many things to be thankful for! I had an amazing weekend filled with people I love.

On Thursday (Thanksgiving) I went to school like normally. I wished a couple people a happy Thanksgiving and thought though it was cool.  Normally on Thanksgiving morning my sister and I color the turkey that comes in the newspaper as we watch the Macy's Thanksgiving day parade.  Well I was lacking a parade and a turkey so I drew my own turkey and colored it in. (And yes this is how I spent my day at school on Thanksgiving)

As always the most colorful turkey around

 

I got home from school, ate real quick then walked to physical therapy.

 

*Side note* For those of you who don't know, I sprained my MCL which is an internal ligament in your knee. I had already sprained this ligament before so it was already weak than when my body spun around too fast and my leg stayed put during a soccer game, I sprained it again.  I've had a long, interesting experience with the medical system here, but that's a story for a different time. Now I have two weeks of physical therapy

 

I hurried home after physical therapy and then attempted to make pumpkin pie. Unlike every grocery store in the U.S., you can't find isles and isles of pumpkin in a can, or even a single can. We had found a recipe on the internet for making pumpkin pie from scratch and it actually wasn't as hard as I expected.  But my host mom had everything laying out and prepared by the time I got home form physical therapy.  All I really had to do was mix it all together. Which my no means went without her yelling at me for doing things wrong.  Needless to say I'm scared to utilize me kitchen here to ever cook anything because I would use the wrong bowls and spoons and constantly be under scrutiny. 

   Turned out as more of a pumpkin tart and kind of resembled a pumpkin pie

the taste wasn't quite on, but it was a pretty good substitute for being in Spain.

 

After the pie was done and me and my host parents were ready, we went and picked up Pauline and Chloe with all their food and bags for the weekend. We made our way to Santiago de la Ribera where we met up with the other 3 exchange students (Andie, Kalob and Curtis) Plus Andie's host mom and sister and Curtis' host mom Charo. Once we arrived we still had to make gravy, mashed potatoes and heat everything up. The turkey arrived in a metal bucket lined with tin foil because Andie's host family didn't have a container big enough for it. 

All of us preparing the gravy and YouTubing how to carve a turkey because clearly none of us had ever done it before.  It turned out pretty well though.

Total we had turkey, mashed potatoes, rum carrots, dinner rolls and this amazing gravy that was Pauline's family recipe. It was delicious and made the entire meal. Also after we demonstrated how the food was to be eaten to our 5 Spanish guests, we went around the circle and said what we were thankful for. Thanksgiving is all about spending time with your family and the people you love and are Thankful for me.  This idea has never been more evident to me than this year. For the first time I am away from my normal, mellow family get together. Instead I was able to spend it with two of my new families.  I've realized since being away from my safety net of a family back home, I am forced to find comfort and companionship from multiple groups of people if I am to stay engaged. This year I was able to spend my Thanksgiving with my host family, people I am immensely thankful for. I also got to share part of my life back home with them which I hope they enjoyed. AND I got to spend it with my second family, the other exchange students.  I honestly would feel a bit lost and lonely without these guys. We're all crazy different, but I think that's what makes us get along so well. It's really cool to see and I'm soooooo thankful for every single one of them. 

 

Anyways, after we went around and said what we were thankful for, Kalob requested that we do a grace.  So Kalob said grace sentence by sentence and I translated each sentence into Spanish so our host families could understand.  This was probably the most gratifying moment I've had on exchange so far.  I never realized before how special Thanksgiving really is and what all it means to me. While explaining it multiple times in Spanish, I see what an amazing tradition it is.  Through grace and saying what we're thankful for, we were able to truly demonstrate the meaning of Thanksgiving to our families and include them in our thanks. Our bilingual grace made me realize how important and cool making worldly connections is. Everyone in the world has stuff they are thankful for and just because the rest of the world doesn't have a day specifically for it, doesn't mean they can't recognize the things they are thankful for. It was an eye opening experience and amazing for being something so simple.  Plus I translated everything nearly perfectly except I didn't know the word for endeavors in Spanish.

 

Our Dinner. Mainly turkey and gravy, but delicious turkey and gravy and that's what really counts.

Also on the far left is a thing my host mom made. It consisted of bread, salmon, pineapple rings, caviar and cheddar cheese...

Circled up to say grace and what we're thankful for

One of the most unique and beautiful Thanksgiving's I've had.  No on has big tables in their houses because there normally isn't room. So we ate sitting on couches in a candle lit room with a blazing fire to keep us warm.  It was amazing.

After we went for a walk we came back and had pie!  We had my pumpkin pie, apple pie and walnut pie. It was supposed to be pecan pie, but Pauline couldn't find pecans. They were all soooooooo delicious and it was a perfect Thanksgiving.

 

Shortly after pie, my host parents left and us exchange students went and did face masks! Chloe has this organic clay something or other face mask that is super strong, so we all took our turn doing that while talking and laughing.  Shortly after we went to bed because by then it was 3ish because we had pie at 12.  The next morning we all had pie for breakfast because we still had a whole walnut and apple pie. We then hung around, went for a walk and took naps until it was time to go ice skating! We went to this mall in Zenia which is a community of mostly not Spanish people. Mainly English or Danish people that have retired down to Spain to live permanently. I've slowly learned that Spain is like Europe's Florida for retirees because there is great food, good wine and plenty of sun. When we got to the mall they had carolers which were all such retirees so they sang the English Christmas songs correctly.  There were also pictures with Santa and an ice skating rink made in the parking lot. We all skated for and hour and a half, walked around the mall a little bit, then headed back to Snatiago de la Ribera to watch a movie and go to bed.

 

Saturday started with a big breakfast of toast, bacon, cookies and milk. After a late breakfast we all showered and lounged around while drinking lots of tea.  It was so enjoyable!  Curtis' house is very homey and it felt so great just to relax and be warm for once.  Later on in the afternoon we walked to the mall in Santiago de la Ribera which was actually a way longer walk than we anticipated, but the exercise and fresh air felt good. After walking around there and eating some, we made our way back to Curtis' house, packed up our stuff and got ready to go to Cartagena.  Charo, Curtis' host mom, has a friend how is an awesome sculpture artist and was having an exhibition in Cartagena.  We went and saw her work, which was amazing, then went back to her apartment with more of her friends. She lives in this little cute apartment right in downtown Cartagena which has a balcony overlooking the Teatro Romano. Which is a Roman theater in Cartagena over 800 years old.  I've seen pictures of it a million times, but still haven't been there because my host family says we'll do touristy stuff some other day when all the exchange students stay in Cartagena.

Standing on her balcony overlooking the theater

Looking down the street from her balcony

We then roamed around Cartagena a little bit and found this medieval street festival where I got a massive donut to share with Andie.  We went back to the party at the artists house for a little longer then went to Chloe's house where her host mom made us sandwiches, we set up the basement with tons of mattresses and comforters then went to bed.

We woke up to a rainy Sunday where we had toast and AMERICAN COFFEE for breakfast.  Every household here has an espresso machine which everyone uses to make a cup for breakfast.  My family however doesn't have one so I relish the opportunity to have it at everyone else's house for breakfast. In Chloe's house they have an American coffee pot and make it every morning.  I had 2 full cups of black coffee because I was so excited.  After breakfast we helped clean up the basement and Pauline and I learned how to make Paella from Chloe's host mom. While we were waiting for the rice and then for the Paella to sit, we all took Chloe's dog for a walk and walked to Pauline's house. I had never seen her house before so that was nice to finally see how she lives.

 

When we came back, we had a huge lunch of Paella, bread and some Spanish tortilla which Chloe's host dad had just made and wanted us to try.

 

After lunch we all packed up our stuff and took the bus into Cartagena.  By then it had stopped raining, but it was still cold and very wet. We went and found the medieval market again with was pretty cool despite the recent rain.  I would've loved to buy stuff, but I had/have no money. (waiting to go do stuff until I get my monthly allowance)

 We had about an hour to walk around the market then Kalob and Andie got picked up by Kalob's host mom.  Chloe and I then took a bus with Curtis to the bus station so he could get a bus back to Santiago de la Ribera. We ended up waiting there for awhile and I actually had to get on the bus and ask for the ticket for him in Spanish then leave.  I caught a bus home, completely exhausted then had an hour and a half conversation with my host parents about my weekend, Rotary and my host brother's when they were younger.

 

It was overall an amazing weekend filled with great company and conversation. I am so thankful for everything that has happened to me so far. The good and bad, I realize every little struggle and every triumph is making me stronger.  I am making new relations everyday.  From the littlest eye contact or hello with someone walking down the street or in school to the deep, constantly growing bond I have with the other exchange students.  No matter what, I can already tell my life will have changed after this year. No matter what part of my heart will always be with my new family here. Despite all of the little tumbles, set backs and downfalls, I know that among the grief and frustration, I have love and growth that will truly prevail and be what I remember most from this year.  

  


 

 

"I spent all my life pretending I was off somewhere else. Off with you, on one of your adventures. But my own adventure turned out to be quite different."

"I spent all my life pretending I was off somewhere else. Off with you, on one of your adventures. But my own adventure turned out to be quite different."

Time to play catch up. Today marks 2 months in Spain which, I have to say, doesn't have much of a profound effect on me. This time I have no profound message or some exciting weekend to go off of. It's not that I haven't been doing anything for a month, just more like what I'm doing has become my routine so I didn't think it would be very interesting to talk about. However, I realize that is because I've already adjusted to all of the social customs which I originally thought we're quite strange/different. Soooo for those of you who haven't spent the last 2 months in Spain getting used to these things everyday, here are some observations and general detail about my life here.

One of the first things people always wonder about foreign countries is if the food is good. The answer is yes! Something I can already tell I'm going to miss when I come home so I'm hoping to learn how to make a couple of my favorites before I leave. Spain is famous for Paella which is a rice, vegetables and either seafood or meat mix. Kind of like Gumbo but less soupy. Also kind of like Feed My Starving Children food, but with way better flavor and real meat.  I've had Paella multiple times here. The first time I made it we were with the exchange students and had a lesson on making Paella. Turns out it's meant to be a social activity because it takes multiple hours to make. I prefer the meat paella over seafood paella, but my host mom, when she makes paella, makes the seafood version. The other day I had arroz negro (black rice) which was paella with just squid and completely black. The ink from the squid turns the entire mixture, plate, your teeth and tongue black. Freaked me out originally but I lived.

Paella

 

Another very common food is Spanish tortilla which is a mixture of egg, potatoes and onion. When it's done it reminds me of quiche, but a little thicker and more durable.  It's probably one of my favorite things here and you eat it plain, with garlic butter on top or on a some bread and make a sandwich. We don't have it too terrible often (unfortunately) because it takes awhile to make.



A meal that is also very common in Spain is arroz del Cubano.  It consists of a fried egg, a very thin pork chop and white rice with tomato sauce poured over it. It's pretty good and easy to make. Other customs related to food include eating some type of fruit everyday after lunch. I really like this custom because honestly, I'm always in the mood for something sweet. Also having pudding, flan or yogurt after dinner for a type of dessert.  Also for breakfast they have lots of pastries and lots of chocolate. There are bakeries everywhere in big cities and you can find a pastry for every meal and loaves and loaves of bread. We actually get a baguette delivered to our house every morning which my host mom generally put out at lunch so you can grab a chuck and dip it in whatever stew type thing we're having. I'm in charge of my own breakfast and two snacks. For breakfast I have a cup of nesquick with either butter toast, cereal or a chocolate croissant if my host mom bought some. For break at school, my host mom bought me these mini baguettes (really just a decent sized dinner roll) which I normal put nutella, butter or chorizo on. At school they have a small cantina where you can by tortilla on a baguette, empenadas, croissants, small pizza or candy. However, most kids bring a bocadillo which is some type of meat or nutella on a baguette. And they are a solid 10 inches long.  yeah big sandwiches. For merienda which is a snack at like 7, I normally have a cup of nesquick (either hot or cold) and some cookies (which are more like graham crackers).

So school is half super similar and the other half very different.  Like I said above, they don't have lunch at school and instead two breaks where we stand around and talk. At the moment, there is a futbol sala league going on.  Futbol sala is 6 v 6 soccer played with small nets. There is a league that now plays during the 20 minute break.  I'll actually be playing in the girls league with a mixture of girls from my soccer team and my class.

One of the 2 games going on during the first break. 

This is the recreation yard. This is where I have gym everyday and the surrounding 2 buildings are classrooms and we're sitting on bleachers that are built into the side of the gym.

 

 

My classes at school are purely lectures meant to prepare the students for the big college entrance test they have at the end of the year. Also, no one dresses up for school. I have seen no dresses and no skirts.  Most of the girls wear leggings and a sweater or sweatshirt. It is true that Spain/Madrid is one of the fashion capitals of the world, however, that influence doesn't seem to reach Cartagena so people wear whatever is comfortable. Teenagers only dress up when they go out on the weekends. Girls do their hair and makeup and often wear heels. As it's getting colder girls are now wearing scarves and boots, but still manage to look very stylish. The guys generally wear a nice pair of jeans or khakis with a sweater. Going out consists of going to various bars to drink, play pool, foosball or sit and talk. Then they migrate from bar to bar. Or they go to a discotec and dance.  And then go to McDonald's at 3 a.m. before going home.  It is also very common to have a boyfriend or girlfriend that goes to a different school. My original thought was how on earth do they find them then?!  Well school is social, yes, but everyone goes out to the same spots on the weekend and actually looks good! So most people don't go to school with their boyfriend or even their best friend cause they met them while out. Also there are no activities through school so if you play a sport o do music, it's through the city so you likely meet kids from all over and they become your best friends.

Me and some of the girls from my soccer team.

 

As far as restaurants go, there are tons and all of them are the same unless they specify "Chinese restaurant" or "Italian restaurant"  all of the other ones serve pretty much the same food and serve every meal.  It is most common to go out for lunch. I never have with my family, but I did quite a few times in Madrid. Lunch is the biggest meal of the day so at a restaurant it's a solid 3 course meal.  They have a lunch menu and from that menu you pick a first course and a second course from a list of 5-6 of each. You then get on free drink and dessert. At all restaurants you can choose from soup, salad, pasta or vegetables for the first course (specific Spanish kinds of course, the same at every restaurant, but a specific type that is Spanish). Then you choose from baked chicken, eggs potatoes and sausage, fish, pork loin or another type of fish cooked differently. There is also always bread on the table. You then pick dessert and all the restaurants have the classics: flan, ice cream, arroz con leche, a type of chocolate cake that I love or fruit. After dessert you are then brought coffee ordered how you like it. So 2 courses, dessert, coffee, a drink and communal bread all for about 12 euro. Needless to say, I really like eating out. There are also coffee bars everywhere. They are literally just bars that serve coffee and alcohol all day, and honestly, people drink both of those at any given time. All of the coffee bars in Cartagena have outdoor seat with they put a wind block around for winter. For dinner, if you go out to a restaurant, you again have the choice of ordering what they call "the menu" or something specific.  If you order the menu it is exactly like lunch with the free beverage, coffee and dessert, but instead of 2 courses they bring communal appetizers.  5 different classic Spanish appetizers which you share between 4 people. I've only been out to dinner once which was with my soccer team. It was a blast and food was great.

 

Some typical Spanish appetizers. Also when you go to a bar it is very common to get a free appetizer when you by a drink so bars always have a supply decent variety.

Croquetas

Calamari

Carne con Tomate

Ensalada Rusa

Patatas Bravas

 

To go shopping, there are tons of stores in el centro (downtown Cartagena). Unfortunately they are pretty much the same stores that are at every mall in Spain, but I still prefer to walk downtown where I can be outside and then see the port instead of the mall we have in the newly developed area. There are also small grocery stores every couple of blocks. My host mom goes to the supermarket everyday to get stuff to cook lunch. Also there are no large grocery stores like Cub, everything is small and neighborhood based.

 

Much like me most kids walk to school. Those who don't get dropped of by someone, ride their bike, a few mopeds or (as I found out today) a lot of people take the bus then walk from the bus stop to school.  Schools are separated by neighborhoods just like in the U.S. so I think everyone should lives within walking distance of my school. However, my school offers a bilingual program where you can take half of your classes in French and I think people come from the suburbs for that program, but very few.

 

I mentioned earlier that it is indeed getting colder! Mid day has cooled down to about 7 degrees whereas mornings and nights are high 50s.  My host mom keeps telling me that November is always really weird because there can be 3 days that are in the 60s and feel like winter then the next 3 days will be in the 80s.  I've definitely noticed that and it makes it impossible to get dressed in the morning. By the time I walk home I'm always burning cause it's the hottest time of the day, but in the morning and during the school day I'm freezing.  Also I have soccer practice from 8-10 at night until June. The cool nights are always taking an effect on me as  I realize I brought one sweatshirt and one pair of sweatpants.  It wouldn't be a huge issue, but I shower after practice then drive home. I didn't dry my hair originally because I go to school in Minnesota with wet hair when it's 3 degrees and nothing happens. But, after going home with we hair I got sick (my host mom gave me a 10 minute long I told you so talk) and now I blow dry my hair and am not allowed to shower in the mornings before school. Also, none of the houses have insulation (because they don't really need is) which means when I'm freezing, I'm absolutely freezing. I've been wearing my fuzzy socks and Columbia fleece more than I expected too and suddenly realize that 3/4 of my clothing is no longer wearable.

 

Now to my family. Here's  picture of them so you can visualize them as I talk about them.

Left to right:

Santiago: my 20 year old brother who lives at home

Leto: my host dad

Paqui: my host mom

Daniel: my 18 year old host brother who is living in Massachusetts while I live in his room

 

Alrighty so Santiago lives at home and goes to university in Murcia which is the capital of my province. It is twice the size of Cartagena and a half hour away in a bus, which is how he gets there.  He commutes to Murcia everyday which isn't super common.  It is very normal, nearly expected, to live with your parents while you go to college in your city. However, if you go to school in a different city, it is common to rent an apartment with other college students. So he isn't supper normal for commuting everyday, but there are buses to and from Murcia every hour because a lot of people go there for work and school.  Santiago is gone by the time I get up in the morning then he comes back at about 4. He then proceeds to sit on the couch, watch tv, sit in his room, do homework? or hang out with is girlfriend. He lives the typical life of a young Spanish person: go to school during the week and do nothing pretty much all week then go out on Friday night till 4 a.m., sleep till 3-5 p.m. get up and eat sit around or sleep more until midnight then repeat. On Sundays he usually sleeps till 5. Typical life of a Spaniard.

 

Now Leto: Leto is the mayor's driver.  He went to a technical type college to learn about cars. He absolutely loves cars and apparently they have some fancy automatic car that he likes driving, but I've never seen it. He also likes racing and betting on derby cars. Yeah like the little ones that you race down a straight track and don't turn. He's also learning to play the trumpet and is just a character.  He reminds me a lot of my own dad in his sense of humor and is often treated like a small child by my host mother. Apparently he's constantly forgetting stuff, but very single minded in a determined sense. He always gives me tips on how not to annoy Paqui and he jokes around with me about my Spanish. Leto is by far the easiest person I've found to talk to here. Yes I get annoyed when he tries to give me tips on how to play soccer when he's never even played and isn't even a fan, but he's just like any dad. He also drives me to soccer, stays and talks during then practice, waits for me to shower, then takes me home. I think he likes feeling like part of the organization and talking with the coaches and organizers every week. He has stern conversations with me sometimes, but we joke around more often than not. I realize as I'm writing this that he's the only one that really makes me feel like part of the family.

 

Ooof now Paqui. Well Paqui doesn't have a job so she stys home and cleans all day.  How she explained it to me was that cleaning is her hobby not her habit. She has a strict schedule of changing the sheets every Monday, vacuuming on Fridays, etc.  We also have designated cups, spoons and dishes for each meal and she checks to see if a baguette is missing every morning to make sure I made myself a snack for school.  She gets worried if she doesn't see my nesquick cup and gets mad if I open the windows when they shouldn't be opened or sit in front of an open window. That's just the top layer of thing. Just like any house wife, the house is her space and her hobby so she likes it a certain way. I understand all of that, but it still takes some getting used to. The majority of the time we have great conversations. We can talk about anything. Weather, religion, names, languages, movies, when I was a kid, school, Spanish culture, anything. Much like moms in general, she like to be right and appear to be the most educated on any given subject.  Something I'm very used to, but she'll still correct me on my comments about the weather or say I told you so when I don't listen to her. Leto and Santiago often piss her off by not remembering the rules of the house or just by out right doing something wrong. She just yells at them till they walk away or grab the correct spoon. With me she realizes she can't really do that so sometimes it can be hard. We'll just get done having a really interesting conversation, but she'll interrupt with the fact that I should hang my bag up downstairs or not use the bathroom because she just cleaned it. Normally she would just yell that, but instead she tells me then goes on to ramble for 10 minutes trying to explain why I shouldn't do something when really she has no reason.  Then it just gets awkward, but I'm getting good at just apologizing a lot. Otherwise she's super nice and is learning to play the clarinet so she does do something!

 

And Daniel who I really wish I knew more. He's in Massachusetts right now and I've talked to him once over Skype, while he was talking to the rest of his family of course. Kids here generally do one activity outside of school, sports or music mostly, but rarely both. Daniel has been in the community band I play in for multiple years playing the trombone. Paqui and Leto have been band parents for multiple years (helping organizing, set up for concerts, etc.) and last year some of the parents decided to take up instruments, that's why they're learning to play the trumpet and clarinet. Thankfully I played an instrument otherwise I would spend a lot of time at home while they went to all of the band things. But yeah Daniel is playing trombone in Massachusetts and actually just got into the Massachusetts State band or something like that. Pretty cool and makes me want to meet this kid seeing as I'm living his life...

 

 So that's them and I seem to fit in petty well... or at least they aren't complaining to my face or anything.

 

Now, like I said, I feel like I haven't done anything terribly interesting in the last month, but that hasn't stopped me from living and thinking. I have plenty (too much) time during the day to sit and contemplate life. If you've ever spent a sufficient amount of time with me you know that I think way too much and my minds goes through a million different thoughts a minute. Below is a list of thoughts and questions which passed through my head today during Lengua.  I purposely left out all of the random fluff thoughts and only chose the stuff that actually pertains to life.  But now you will see exactly what I have been doing for a month.

 

"Has my learning of Spanish hit a plateau? Am I wasting precious time of my exchange by watching movies? Is there a "right" way to do this? What would I be doing if I were home right now? Will I ever be fluent? I tell my self all in good time, but will being fluent and making friends happen on their own or do I have to be proactive? Would it be "easier" in a country where everything is different so I wouldn't constantly be comparing and instead just accept everything as new? Will this year make me permanently lazy? Will I really make life long friends because right now it doesn't feel like it... In some ways I've been stripped of my independence and in others I've been given way more independence. Am I being a good ambassador? Will there be a time when I don't think about home everyday? Will I be disappointed when I come home and everything isn't as I've been dreaming about it and remembering it as all year? Am I hurting myself by not writing, reading and trying to think in Spanish? ...It never hit me that I'm in Spain. I never got that in awe moment. It's not that I want to leave, but there's nothing keeping me here so far. Am I making myself an even more passive person my not telling my host mom I don't like peas or for just not standing up fro myself in general? Will that passiveness hurt me next year at college where I have to actually fend for myself? Am I reluctant to change? Do I not like what I think I would become? Am I truly content or just adjusting to going through the motions? Am I killing myself by talking to my family everyday? What specifically about this lifestyle does my host brother miss while in the U.S.? Did I have too high of expectations of what this would be like before I got here? Does my exchange and Spain still have the potential to fulfill those expectations? What would each of these kids think if they came to the U.S. and experienced my life?"

 

So you see I haven't exactly been content with just going through my normal routine. But maybe it's what I need to accept.  As you can see I'm stuck somewhere between accepting my lifestyle and being proactive. But as Frodo said, my experience turned out a lot different than I expected.  It's not a bad thing. I have good days and bad just like anyone else. As for now I guess we'll just have to wait and see what happens.  As always, I'm up for new opportunities and adventures.

 

Hopefully now you know a bit more about my life and I'm sorry it's been a month since I blogged. I promise keeping you all in the loop is my main priority (after making friends, speaking Spanish and living).

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 





"All's well that ends better"

"All's well that ends better."

I know these are becoming too frequent for some of you to keep up with, but so many exciting things have been happening and, in all honesty, these are as much for you as they are for me.  When I have a revelation, I like to write it all down so I won't forget it. (This rapid writing to get all my thoughts out and make sure I don't miss anything is also the cause of many spelling errors so if you could just ignore those that would be great and to all of you who were wondering since my last post: I eat frozen PIZZA for dinner often, not frozen people)

Returning from an amazing weekend in Madrid, I realize my view of Spain has evolved into something far more extensive then what is was on Thursday. Which started with me going to school like always. Not quite a monotonous task quite yet, but it' getting repetitive as expected. I knew we were going to a dance performance in Murcia that night with all 6 exchange students in my province so that helped.  When I came home from school my host dad told me I would be going to Madrid this weekend with Kalob (pasty white North Carolinaian who lives in Murcia), Curtis (tall skinny Canadian who lives in San Javier) and Charo (Curtis's amazing host mom). I was instantly giddy which was only increased with him telling me we would be leaving from the dance to spend the night at Curtis' then leave super early in the morning for Madrid.  That meant no school on Friday. Good news coming one after another. So I ran upstairs and packed for the weekend then headed out to the dance thing in Murcia.  It was very cool and a mixture of contemporary dance with dances from all over the world.

Us after the performance with a man named Antonio who arranged for us to go there.

 

Cool story: the girl in the black dress, Madeline, is not an exchange student. She is 20 something and is from Massachusetts. She spent the last 3 years in Texas teaching for Teach for America and saving up to travel. She spent a month and a half this summer road tripping across the U.S. and now she is making her way around Europe.  She started in Norway then Sweden, Belgium, Netherlands, Germany, France and now a month in Cartagena. She hopes to make her way to Italy and she'll be in New Zealand by December.  She's staying at friends houses and using couch surfing (a website where people make a profile and offer up room in their homes for travelers like Madeline).  Anyway she was awesome to talk to. Her plans seemed a little more trustworthy than backpacking, but she was still just exploring which is awesome. Mom and Dad, you'll be happy to hear I've decided I'm not up for anything of that caliber just yet, but it seems like an awesome way to explore our great big world.

 

 

After the dance performance, Kalob, Curtis, Charo and I went to Curtis' house ate, got 2 hours of sleep then woke up at 7 the next day to go to Madrid.  A little background: Charo works in advertising and travels to Madrid about once a month, but also goes to Granada, Valencia, Seville, etc. for her work and has offered to bring Curtis with her so he can see Spain. This time around he invited Kalob and I to go too which I am so grateful for. Charo used to live in Madrid before she decided she'd rather see the sea everyday so she moved to San Javier. She also worked for National Geographic for 2 years and traveled all around the world.  Needless to say, she has ton of friends and tons of stories.  She's just awesome.

 

Anyway, once we got to Madrid, Charo dropped us off outside of el Museo de Prada which is crazy famous and has work from Goya and Velasquez and is supposed to be amazing. However, we didn't actually go in the Museum.  Miscommunication and something lost in translation led us to believe we were waiting for Charo to visit the museum so we were going to wait for her to be finish her meeting then go.  Yeah... not the case, but instead we spent 4 hours roaming around an awesome neighborhood in Madrid, which none of us minded. I took a gazillion pictures because this was the first time I encountered streets and buildings that looked like my preconceived idea of Europe. Here are some:

 

 

 After roaming around just the 3 of us for 4 hours, Charo and her brother who lives in Madrid and is a World renowned movie director showed us around another cool neighborhood. In Madrid they have Plazas everywhere which are kind of like little town squares lined with shops and just for foot traffic. They are always packed with people starting at 8 a.m. and then late into the night like 6 a.m. I love this system because everyone is there, out and about. One thing I had noticed about Spain that became even more evident this weekend was the sense of community and overall friendliness.  Everyone is so family oriented and always eager to meet new people. People are literally always in the streets and out of their houses to do so. You'll see families with their new born baby or 2 year old sitting at a café at 12:30 at night. It's awesome. Everyone is very eager to meet new people and form long lasting relationships. And cities like Madrid were even built for this type of interaction. They have Plazas! they're built for exactly that.  Anyway I just think it's very cool and I'm a bit jealous. Anytime you don't have someone to hang out with you could just go to the Plaza and likely find someone you knew, if not someone new to talk to.

Sidewalk lined with shops that encircles the plaza



After having coffee in the plaza (an afternoon custom I could totally get used to) we went and saw the Royal Palace and Cathedral. Some of the coolest buildings I've ever seen. My pictures likely don't do them justice.

Cathedral from across the street

Royal Palace

not where the royals actually live anymore but where Obama and his sort stay when they visit

Cathedral up close and literally across the pavement from the palace so when royals get married, they just lay down a red carpet from the door of the cathedral to the royal palace so they walk home

 

After walking around, Charo took the 3 of us to the house of a friend of hers for dinner.  Ana, her friend, lives with her husband and 2 boys in the middle of Madrid and has been best friends with Charo since they were little. They were super nice and dinner was great. I can now participate in conversations fairly regularly and I always love surprising people by laughing at their jokes or adding something in.   After dinner we went to Maria's (another friend of Charo's) house to spend the night.  She lives in the center of Madrid in a penthouse perfect for one person.  She is an opera singer and loves cats.  She is quite the lady and an all around awesome person. This is her apartment:

(if you've every talked to me extensively about houses, I've likely mentioned my love of massive windows and floor to ceiling bookshelves...just saying)

The view from the balcony of the street below

Rooftops of Madrid from her balcony

Her adorable balcony. Just an amazing spot.  I probably would've slept out there if it weren't so cold

 

 

The next morning me, Kalob, Curtis, Charo, Maria and Ana piled in Ana's car and traveled an hour to Segovia. I can't even begin to describe Segovia. Exactly what I picture when I think of small old streets and towns in Europe is Segovia.  I almost wanted to cry when I saw it. I definitely had a preconceived idea of what Spain would look like before I came and Cartagena definitely did not fit that picture. Segovia definitely did. It is a very old city with cobblestone streets, a castle, a cathedral and aqueducts! We had coffee sitting beneath the aqueducts and talked about Rotary and exchange. I loved being able to talk to Charo and her friends with no problem. We were also in fall clothing sipping coffee and sitting in the sun. I could've stay there all day, but instead we walked around the city which was a better choice because it was beautiful. I took a million pictures and the guys kept getting mad at me for taking a picture of every alley way. But honestly, the city looked like a fairytale. We toured the castle which was amazing, had a huge lunch (like always) and then toured the cathedral.  Here are some pictures:

The city of Segovia

 Cathedral
sadly you can't see the detail on the turrets but if you could you'd be amazeS

 

 

Aqueducts

Constructed with no cement, just rocks

Castle (supposedly Walt Disney's inspiration for the Disney Castle...I don't really see the resemblance) But it had a moat, tower, throne room, courtyard and everything 

 

Charo left, Maria right

Maria on the left, Charo on the right

 

 From on top of the Castle. 120 some steps which the 3 of us climbed, but Charo, Maria and Ana opted out of. They missed out, the view was amazing. You could see all of Segovia.

 

After Segovia we went to this adorable medieval town called Pedraza. It was also picturesque "medieval" as in exactly what comes to mind when you think adorable, old, Spanish village.  I tired to take as many pictures as I could, but the sun was going down so it was hard.  We just roamed the streets for an hour or so as Maria belted out some Opera.  It was hilarious and the town was gorgeous.

 

We then drove back to Madrid and to Maria's house where we made dinner. I had salad for the first time in Spain for dinner. It tasted so good I had forgotten how much I missed it. Curtis and Kalob said they have salad at every lunch which is definitely different from my house. We also made brownies from a box that Kalob was sent for his birthday. They didn't turn out like normal brownies because we completely messed up the measurements trying to convert them to grams. They still tasted really good though. 

 

The next morning we got up and had breakfast then Charo sat me down and showed me the route we should take to do some more touristy things. Because I actually understand Spanish, I was in charge. So after we had a route, a map and, for me a borrowed jacket from Maria, we left.  (we had planned for a cold weekend in Madrid, but not that cold. The weather changes so much during the day it's hard, but when we left Maria's in the morning it was 50 degrees so a borrowed jacket was fine with me)  The three of us took the Metro to el Parque de el Retiro. It's a huge park in the middle of Madrid very much like Central Park in New York. There were street performers, artists and lots of different booths throughout the park. There is also a lake in the middle where they have row boats which you can rent to go around in. We of course did that and thank goodness I had two very cocky teenage boys with me who were overly eager to row the thing, so I never did. We also found el Palacio de Cristal which is a huge conservatory also in this park.

 

We then left the park and strolled past some other monuments in Madrid and walked down Calle Gran Via which is really famous and has lots of shops.  We ate lunch then made our way back to Maria's where we hung around on her balcony for awhile.  It was finally warm enough to be out there in the afternoon sun and it felt amazing just so sit and look out over Madrid.  It's moments like that where I realize how lucky I am.  I was looking out over the capital of a Spanish speaking country in Europe as I talk to people I know I'm going to have a lifelong friendship with even though I've barely known them a month. Exchange takes you crazy places and I couldn't be happier just to sit back and enjoy them. 

 

 

Not that I had any doubts about this weekend excursion, but "all's well that ends better" and I'd say I ended better than I started and only after 3 days. Before this weekend I feel like my view of Spain just consisted of Cartagena, Murcia and San Javier. And to be completely honest, I was a little disappointed. I hate to admit it, but I love the history, old buildings, small town with cobble stone streets of Europe and when I arrived here and that's not what greeted me, I was sad. But this weekend I realized that those places do exist like I imagined. It's crazy to think a country the size of Texas could be as diverse in climate and terrain as the U.S., but it's true. My view of Spain has already broadened so much just by visiting 3 extra cities. Now I can't wait to see the rest of Spain just to see what else there is. 

 

It was so awesome to be exposed to other ways of living too. I experienced life from the perspective of 3 different families this weekend and it was phenomenal. I love knowing that the life I'm living right now may be "typical" of Spain, but then there are a hundred different "typical"s.  It does make it hard knowing there are people living what I think to be a more appealing lifestyle than the one I am right now, but I remind myself there is adjustment to be done everywhere. I'm sure if I were living with Maria, Charo or Ana there would still be many times that I'm uncomfortable and do things wrong within their home.

 

The point now is that I can walk away and say that in just 3 days I broadened my view of the world and gained an immense appreciation for the country I'm living in and the opportunity I have to be living here. One month here as of Saturday and I've come to this conclusion: Stop worrying and get out there and live. There is so much to be seen and heard that you won't help yourself by being hesitant. Sure you'll have ups and downs and no, you won't have an "experience of  lifetime" everyday. But it's the fact that just by getting up in the morning and living everyday, you're trying something new which will always make you a wiser person than you were the day before.